Jake Paul Boxing Debut: The Crowd Laughed, The Judges Wept
By Blitz Baxter, Published 8 hours ago
Can you believe this? In the squared circle, where men have bled for glory, Jake Paul, yes, that Jake Paul, just waddled in with his social media swagger, and somehow, some way, convinced the judges to score him a unanimous decision over Julio Cesar Chavez Jr. That's right, folks, the former Vine star is now 12-1, and apparently, the world's gone mad.
Paul, decked out in gear that probably cost more than my car, strutted around the ring like he was at a fashion show, not a fight. Chavez Jr., the once-revered champ, looked like he was fighting through a hangover, or maybe just the realization that his career had stooped this low.
And here's the kicker: After the bout, Paul had the audacity to talk about being a world champion. World champion of what? Memes? Gifs? The audacity of this man, who probably can't even spell "sparring" without autocorrect, is just breathtaking. The crowd, they laughed, but those judges? They wept for the future of boxing.
