"Trump's Iran Policy: Pray for the Best, Prepare for the Apocalypse"
By Vixen Vile, Published 6 hours ago
Oh, the drama! President Trump has finally hit upon his grand strategy for dealing with Iran: either pray for a nuclear deal or pack up and run for the hills. You'd think the man had learned his lesson from past adventures in international relations, but nope, he's at it again, bouncing back and forth between hope and hysteria like he's auditioning for a reality show on geopolitical whiplash.
First, he's dangling the carrot of a "nuclear deal" that could, in theory, keep the world from turning into a fiery inferno. The thought of Trump, the deal-maker, negotiating peace with Iran is as reassuring as letting a toddler pilot a Boeing 747. Yet, his advisors must think it's a stroke of genius because, apparently, the art of the deal includes a side of panic.
Then, within hours, he's on Twitter (or wherever he's allowed to spew his thoughts these days), telling the entire population of Tehran to flee for their lives. One must wonder if he's consulted with his real estate buddies to find a good place for 9.5 million people to relocate. Perhaps they can crash at Mar-a-Lago for a few months? The sudden shift from hopeful negotiator to doomsday prophet is enough to give any sane person whiplash or at least a severe case of confusion.
This is diplomacy, Trump style: Swing wildly between offering handshakes and issuing end-times warnings. It's like watching a game of chess where one player is trying to win by simply knocking over all the pieces with his elbows. If Trump keeps this up, the only thing certain about Iran will be that they'll need a good set of running shoes... just in case.
