Dinosaur Film Predicted to Gross More Than the Entire Economy of Burundi
By Poppy Posh, Published 6 hours ago
At last, the cinematic equivalent of a bargain bin dinosaur toy has arrived with a bang. 'Jurassic World Rebirth', the latest in the never-ending parade of prehistoric cinema, is apparently on course to devour the global box office, earning a staggering $260 million. Because, evidently, nothing says "I have taste" like watching CGI lizards run amok for the 27th time.
One might argue that the global economy could use a boost, but to pin one's hopes on a franchise that's been flogging a dead (dinosaur) horse for decades is a tad concerning. Picture this: the combined might of international audiences, each shelling out hard-earned cash for a spectacle of roaring, stomping, and an underwhelming plot. It's not the rebirth of culture, but the death knell of originality.
This isn't just a film; it's an event, or rather, a societal surrender to the lowest common denominator of entertainment. One wonders what the discerning viewer must endure as cinema halls become overrun with raptor enthusiasts, while those of us with refined palates are left to sip our tea, lamenting the death of intelligent conversation. Next week, the Superman film opens, but honestly, after this, one fears even the Man of Steel might not be able to save us from our collective madness.
