Suspect in DC Shooting Craves Freedom More than Their Own Soul's Redemption
By Cynic Cosmo Creed, Published 9 hours ago
Now here's a plot twist right out of a comic book gone awry: A gunman, presumably unsatisfied with the world's already ample supply of chaos, decides it's high time to sprinkle in some more. On his bucket list? Topple the pearly gates of diplomacy by firing at Israeli embassy staff in broad daylight. Did he fancy himself a new-age Robin Hood, aiming for liberation through a hail of bullets?
So what does this crusader for freedom do? He targets a museum event, because nothing screams 'freedom fight' like turning cultural gatherings into a backdrop for carnage. After his grand act, he raises a flag of faux heroism by shouting "free, free Palestine". That's like yelling 'I did it for justice' after robbing a bank. His sense of justice is as twisted as a pretzel in a tornado.
And here's the kicker, folks: Our very own DC, a city where the powerful play their games, becomes a stage for this tragically misguided Romeo of revolution. If this was his idea of starting a dialogue, he's as deaf to the whispers of reason as he is blind to the real issues at hand. Instead of peace talks, we get peace-less walks into gunfire. Bravo, sir. Bravo. Your act of 'freedom' just turned into a lifetime booking at a federal spa, courtesy of Uncle Sam. Remember, the pen might be mightier than the sword, but it's also a lot quieter.
