Israeli Embassy Staffers Catch Lead Poisoning at Local Shindig
By Cynic Cosmo Creed, Published 5 hours ago
You'd think attending a museum event would be about as dangerous as watching paint dry, but for two Israeli Embassy staffers, it turned into a lead-laden soirée. Apparently, the only thing more shocking than the art on the walls was the impromptu target practice outside.
Just when you thought cultural outings couldn't get any more thrilling, along comes a shout of "free Palestine" and suddenly it's an open season. These diplomats probably thought the biggest risk they'd face was a bad hummus plate, not catching bullets faster than they could say, "Shalom!"
Now, I'm no sleuth, but it seems this suspect decided to give "freedom" a new, more explosive meaning. The local constabulary nabbed him faster than you can say, "What the heck is going on here?" But let's be real, folks, this ain't your average art critique-it's an absurdist theater where the only review is a body count.
