Fed Hits the Snooze Button on Interest Rates Again: Guess Who's Not Rocking the Boat?
By Rex 'The Wrecker' Malone, Published Published 2025-06-19
Oh, the Fed, those fearless guardians of the economy, have once again decided to keep interest rates as exciting as a flatline on a heart monitor. They've chosen to play it safer than a turtle in a tank of molasses, leaving rates unchanged. In a world where every financial decision is like playing Russian roulette with a fully loaded gun, they've decided to stick to the script.
But let's not forget our friends over at the Taiwan Central Bank, who must have taken a masterclass in "How to Do Nothing Effectively." They're following the Fed like a puppy trailing its owner, hoping not to step in any financial doggy doo. It's almost as if they've forgotten how to use the levers of economic policy, leaving them as untouched as a nun's chastity belt.
And while the rest of us are out here dodging bullets, metaphorically and sometimes literally, these central bankers are sipping their lattes, discussing how to keep the status quo so intact you'd think it was made of Kevlar. They're not just playing it safe; they're playing it like they're afraid the economy might get a paper cut. Meanwhile, the rest of us are left wondering if these rate decisions are made by actual economists or by a Magic 8-Ball.
