Iran's Top General: "We're Entitled to Retaliate After US Strikes. Israel, Brace for Impact!"
By Vixen Vile, Published 4 hours ago
Ah, it seems our dear Iranian top general, in a stunning display of geopolitical prowess, has finally stumbled upon the obvious: when America flexes, retaliation is not just a right but a dire necessity. One might ponder, amidst the volleys of missiles and the shadow of mutual assured destruction, what took him so long to scribble this revelation in his playbook?
In a maneuver straight out of the playbook of self-preservation, the esteemed general hinted that Israel might just be the lucky recipient of their retaliatory affections. How generous, one might jest, offering up a nation like a sacrificial lamb to appease the gods of war.
And in this grand game of Middle Eastern chess, let's not overlook the sheer audacity required to signal intentions as if sending a formal RSVP. No, no, it's not just about the act of retaliation; it's about ensuring everyone knows your move before you make it. Thus, allowing every diplomat, drone, and donkey in the region to brace for the impending display of military might, or in more honest terms, the sound and fury signifying not much but political posturing.
So here we stand, on the brink of perhaps not World War III, but certainly a sequel to the regional conflicts already too numerous to count, all thanks to the strategic genius of Iran's top brass, whose next brilliant move might just be to publish a memoir titled, "How to Provoke and Pander: A Guide to International Shenanigans."
