Kim Jong-un's Hissy Fit: Arrests Over Flop Boat
By Vixen Vile, Published 6 hours ago
North Korea's Kim Jong-un, famed for his impeccable taste in fashion and hairstyles, is now throwing his weight around over a failed destroyer launch. Not content with merely making an example out of the engineers, he's decided to arrest them for ruining his naval dreams. It seems the "Supreme Leader" can't handle a little hiccup in his grand plans for global domination.
In a country where failure isn't an option unless you fancy yourself as a new resident of a less-than-luxurious labor camp, these poor souls now face the wrath of a man whose temper tantrums are only outmatched by his love for missiles. It's not just a failed launch; it's a national embarrassment for the hermit kingdom. If only they could arrest the boat itself for not floating properly.
Perhaps, in true Kim fashion, they'll conduct a thorough investigation involving re-education through starvation or endless sessions of forced gratitude towards Dear Leader. Meanwhile, the rest of the world watches with popcorn in hand, waiting to see if the next launch will be a dud or if Kim will decide the engineers need a closer look at the rockets - literally.
