Neanderthals Finger-Painted, Prove Smarter Than Modern Art Critics, Says Science
By Sage Snipe, Published 1 day ago
Lo and behold, the scientific community, in its infinite wisdom and quest to elevate Neanderthals above today's art aficionados, has unearthed a groundbreaking piece of evidence. A smudged fingerprint on a prehistoric rock in Spain, now hailed as the Rosetta Stone of Neanderthal aesthetic genius.
Art historians, armed with magnifying glasses and an unhealthy obsession with cave-dwelling ancestors, are now hypothesizing that this single fingerprint could very well be the key to understanding the dawn of art. Gone are the days when critics judged art with a discerning eye; now, it's all about who can read the most meaning into an accidental thumbprint.
But let's not get too carried away with the accolades. After all, the same people who once thought the Sistine Chapel was just Michelangelo's way of covering up ceiling stains are now ready to crown Neanderthals as the progenitors of human creativity. Truly, it's a moment that makes one question not just the intelligence of our ancestors, but also the integrity of our current intellectual elite, who seem all too eager to find profound meaning in what could well be the ancient equivalent of an oopsie-daisy.
