Trump Offers Marriage Advice to Macron: "Keep Your French Doors Closed"
By Vixen Vile, Published 1 day ago
Ah, the French! Not only do they surrender at the drop of a beret, but now they've got domestic strife reaching international waters. In a display that outdid even the most dramatic soap operas, Brigitte Macron, tired of playing the demure First Lady, decided to give her husband a literal slap in the face. Not metaphorically, mind you, but with the grace and precision of a master fencer. Enter Donald Trump, the sage of all marital wisdom, chuckling like a Cheshire cat while offering his two cents - or in this case, perhaps a couple of euros.
"Keep the door closed," Trump snickers, as if that's the solution to keeping out the cold air of French political disagreements. Clearly, he must think the secret to a happy marriage is about as complex as playing golf, where you just swing and hope for the best. One can imagine him, post-advice, winking at the camera, ready to move on to the next scandal du jour, or perhaps contemplating how to turn this into a reality TV show.
One has to wonder, would Melania approve of this sage counsel? Or would she too, be reaching for a handy slap or maybe just a White House door to slam shut on such triviality? In the world of Trump's mind, where everything is either a deal or a disaster, the slap heard around the world is just another play for ratings. Meanwhile, Macron, likely regretting his choice in headwear, might just be wondering if keeping his doors closed would mean Brigitte would keep her hands to herself.
