Trump's Brilliant Plan to Snag Chinese Spies: Visa Revocation Spectacular!
By Vixen Vile, Published 1 day ago
Oh, what a shock! The Trump administration, in a stroke of unparalleled genius, decides to start playing the most thrilling game of spy-versus-spy with Chinese college students. Because, you know, if there's anything that screams "covert operative," it's a pimply, anxious undergrad trying to survive on instant noodles and late-night study sessions.
These "experts," bless their paranoid hearts, seem to think that this visa revocation spree is as helpful as setting off fireworks in a library. But come on, folks, who doesn't love a good old-fashioned witch hunt? Forget about diplomacy; let's just go full McCarthy on the international student population! Because if there's one thing we've learned from history, it's that mass suspicion is the key to international goodwill.
And let's not forget the backlash, oh no! Some have dared to call this heavy-handed! Imagine that, preferring evidence-based security measures over a blanket declaration of "Everyone's a Spy!" But what do these so-called spy-hunters know? They're just the ones who actually catch real spies, after all. No, let's stick with Trump's masterstroke. Who needs subtlety when you've got an executive order?
