Wisconsin's Abortion Ban: Tossed Faster Than a Bad Salad at a Potluck!
By Vixen Vile, Published 10 hours ago
Oh, Wisconsin, you wild and wacky state! Your high court just decided that a law older than your statehood and most certainly older than your average voter's great-grandma, should take a long walk off a short pier. Yes, folks, the 1849 abortion ban, which was so outdated that it was probably written with a feather quill and ink made from powdered unicorn horn, has been struck down with a gavel that probably weighed more than the law itself.
The liberal justices, probably all wearing their "I Voted To Make The 1849 Law Void" T-shirts, ruled that newer laws have effectively said "step aside, grandpa!" to this ancient relic of medical quackery. This decision was not just a strike-down; it was a full-blown, jazz hands, tap-dancing "Fosse-style" dismissal of a law that might as well have been scribbled on parchment by a time-traveling caveman.
Now, thanks to this judicial wisdom, Wisconsinites can now breathe a sigh of relief knowing that their reproductive rights won't be dictated by laws that were enacted when women couldn't even vote. Because nothing says progress like making a 19th-century law obsolete faster than you can say "Dial-A-Time."
