US Unveils Peace Plan: Hamas to Release Dead Hostages for Live Prisoners
By Vixen Vile, Published 1 day ago
Ah, the grand peace plan has arrived, folks. The brainchild of the US, with Israel's stamp of approval, because nothing says 'permanent ceasefire' quite like trading dead hostages for living prisoners. Just imagine the scene: Hamas, in their infinite generosity, handing over the dearly departed to get back their breathing comrades.
The terms? A measly 10 living hostages and 18 of the dearly departed for a cool 125 Palestinians serving life and 1,111 Gazans picked up during this whole debacle. Because, of course, what's a ceasefire without a little human bargaining? It's like a macabre game show, except instead of prizes, we're swapping lives and legacies.
And let's not forget the sheer audacity of the proposal. Hamas, known for their compassion, is supposed to agree to this? One can only imagine the laughter echoing through their tunnels. But hey, it's the US, so naturally, this plan must be the pinnacle of diplomatic prowess. Maybe next, we'll see a swap for the souls of the departed.
Oh, the peace we shall have! The world watches with bated breath as this plan unfolds, a testament to the sanity of our global leaders. Surely, this is the path to a lasting peace, right? Right.
