"Ballerina" John Wick Spinoff: A Glimpse into Hollywood's Ballet of Bad Taste
By Poppy Posh, Published Published 2025-06-06
The world of cinema has once again proven its penchant for the preposterous with the announcement that the 'Ballerina' John Wick spinoff is set to pirouette into theaters with a staggering $3.5 million in previews. This isn't just a film; it's a financial fiasco wrapped in tulle, a ballet of bad taste where the only twirls are those of the executives counting their ill-gotten gains.
One can only imagine the high society soirée where this news was broken. Doubtless, amidst the clinking of champagne flutes and the rustle of designer gowns, the attendees feigned excitement for a film that promises to be as graceful as a rhinoceros on pointe shoes. The cultural commentary is clear: if Hollywood can make millions from a story about a ballet assassin, then perhaps we've truly reached the apex of absurdity in entertainment.
Let us not forget the true tragedy here - the audience. They, poor souls, will be subjected to this cinematic catastrophe, their minds numbed by the relentless choreography of violence, all for the sake of a franchise that has already danced its last waltz. One can only hope that the film's budget was spent on something more useful, like teaching the directors actual ballet, for their understanding seems to be limited to the grand jeté of dollar bills.
