Proud Boys Demand $100M From Uncle Sam for Daring to Prosecute Their Loveable Little Rebellion
By Vixen Vile, Published 11 hours ago
Now here's a real sob story for you - the Proud Boys, after being charged, tried, and convicted for their part in the little Capitol sleepover party on January 6, are now hitting the U.S. government with a lawsuit so audacious, it makes a diamond-encrusted tiara seem like a modest accessory. Yes, they're looking for $100 million in damages for having the audacity to be prosecuted.
After being pardoned like some felonious fairy tale come true, these paragons of constitutional rights claim their freedoms were violated when they were treated like any common law breaker. Oh, the humanity! Perhaps they expected a parade and a congressional award for their "peaceful tourism" in the Capitol?
But let's not forget the chilling effect this might have. If the government is allowed to prosecute people for breaking the law, where will it end? Soon, everyone from jaywalkers to people who sneak grapes in grocery stores might find themselves up against the long arm of the law. What an outrage! Clearly, the Constitution was designed to protect the right to insurrection, or so these legal luminaries claim.
